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- Maria
- God has blessed me tremendously with an amazing husband, Doug, and two gorgeous little boys, Gavin and Joey. It has always been a dream of mine to have a large family but God may have other plans. I had a series of 6 consecutive early miscarriages when trying for baby #2. We are currently trying for baby #3 after our 7th miscarriage. I am faithful that God's plan is perfect, even when I am not happy about it. I love comments and meeting new followers so please don't be shy!
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Friday, October 14, 2011
Fertility Friday- Top 10 Signs You Might Be Infertile
10. When you are out shopping you can't help but stare at the abdomens of every woman between the ages of 12 and 45 and determine how far along they are. Because, after all, everyone else is pregnant. Seriously. They are! And if they aren't, they will be any second.
9. The people at Amazon and Ebay are totally on to you. No fertile woman would ever buy 50+ pregnant tests at a time or 100 ovulation tests. I like to pretend that there is a group of ladies in the packaging department at Amazon who say a little prayer every time they tape up another big box of pee sticks.
8. The simple words "Just Relax" make you take a deep breath and instead of considering a spa day, you think of 3 places to hide a body.
7. Talking about your uterus, ovaries, and fallopian tubes are akin to talking about turkey, lettuce, and whole wheat bread. No biggie. Want to talk about details? Those are just like adding a dab of mayo.
6. You have sewn a cup holder into the inside of your shirt for transporting the swimmers to their destination.
5. You calculate your due date long before you have ovulated.
4. Television and movies are almost unbearable. When the actresses aren't expecting, their characters are. Then there is the occasional infertility sub plot which lasts for an episode or two but then that just means that they will miraculously get pregnant with twins in the next episode. No wonder the fertile people tell us to relax. We will be pregnant in two weeks according to the TV shows.
3. Baby showers are right up there on the list with root canals. Put some pink and blue balloons in a dentist's office, perhaps a streamer or two, and crank up the drill! Good times ahead!
2. You have considered wearing sunglasses to work and talking into a wrist watch since they probably already think you are a secret agent. I mean, who else would have that many "appointments" or "quick lab work" excuses?
1. People suggesting adoption can be infuriating! It is like going to a Mexican restaurant because you have been craving a burrito for a month and the waitress says, well, we don't have any burritos today but you know what is really good?! A tater tot! Do you want a tater tot? They are really good! I'm sure the tater tots are good and maybe another day I'll really want a tater tot. But, today give me a freaking burrito for crying out loud!
9. The people at Amazon and Ebay are totally on to you. No fertile woman would ever buy 50+ pregnant tests at a time or 100 ovulation tests. I like to pretend that there is a group of ladies in the packaging department at Amazon who say a little prayer every time they tape up another big box of pee sticks.
8. The simple words "Just Relax" make you take a deep breath and instead of considering a spa day, you think of 3 places to hide a body.
7. Talking about your uterus, ovaries, and fallopian tubes are akin to talking about turkey, lettuce, and whole wheat bread. No biggie. Want to talk about details? Those are just like adding a dab of mayo.
6. You have sewn a cup holder into the inside of your shirt for transporting the swimmers to their destination.
5. You calculate your due date long before you have ovulated.
4. Television and movies are almost unbearable. When the actresses aren't expecting, their characters are. Then there is the occasional infertility sub plot which lasts for an episode or two but then that just means that they will miraculously get pregnant with twins in the next episode. No wonder the fertile people tell us to relax. We will be pregnant in two weeks according to the TV shows.
3. Baby showers are right up there on the list with root canals. Put some pink and blue balloons in a dentist's office, perhaps a streamer or two, and crank up the drill! Good times ahead!
2. You have considered wearing sunglasses to work and talking into a wrist watch since they probably already think you are a secret agent. I mean, who else would have that many "appointments" or "quick lab work" excuses?
1. People suggesting adoption can be infuriating! It is like going to a Mexican restaurant because you have been craving a burrito for a month and the waitress says, well, we don't have any burritos today but you know what is really good?! A tater tot! Do you want a tater tot? They are really good! I'm sure the tater tots are good and maybe another day I'll really want a tater tot. But, today give me a freaking burrito for crying out loud!
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