Before I became a mother,I worked in the mental health field. It was nearly everyday that it was noted in someone's file that they were schizophrenic. They heard voices. IF this was the only criteria for schizophrenia then I would have to say that I am, indeed, schizophrenic. Every morning, the voice in my head coaxes me to get motivated to climb out from under the warm blankets on my bed. The voice in my head then helps me choose what to wear. Then the voice helps me decide between a pop tart or a bowl of cereal for breakfast. The voice in my head helps me decide what is appropriate to say in a conversation. It helps me decide how to respond to my son's inappropriate behavior. It helps me in everything I do. Everyday.

When asking someone who may or may not be mentally ill if they hear voices is really unfair. I think we all hear voices. It is just a matter of if we identify that voice as being our own. I used to always think that that voice was me. But after giving it more thought, I think that voice in my head is God helping me with my day. God is present in everything that we do and he is always willing to communicate with us, if we are willing to listen. And, if I am ever not sure about what I should do, if I ask Him, He will answer.

I have decided to really focus on listening to that voice in my head. God is trying to tell me what I need to know all the time. I need to listen. I also need to beware that the Satan isn't able to permeate my head and convince me to do evil.

This must be what people mean when they say that God spoke to them. They must really be listening, ready to really hear and really do God's will. I need to better job of being schizophrenic and letting God direct me.



Just for fun. This is Gavin a few years ago.