The good news is that I am going to get another 4 weeks to lose more weight.  I had a melt down yesterday when I my last shred of hope was washed away with another lower temperature.  One hormonal cry never hurt anyone.  Cycle 27 of trying will be starting at any moment. 

I am excited about losing more weight.  I was explaining to Doug the other day that about 2 days after I got pregnant last time, I started feeling depressed about my weight and the probability that I would be gaining another 40 pounds.  I am really hoping that when I do get pregnant again, I won't worry for one second about gaining pregnancy pounds.  I want my next pregnancy (and likely last) to be my healthiest! 

I have noticed that in my last several charts that my temperatures peak at about 6-8 days past ovulation and then my "symptoms" disappear and my temps start a steady decline to my coverline.  It used to be that my temperature would be nice and high until the day before my period would start.  So, as a precautionary measure, I am going to talk to my doctor about  using progesterone again.  I used it at one point but it was being used to prevent miscarriages.  Interestingly, I decided not to use it when got pregnant with Joey since it hadn't worked on the previous 3 losses.  I think it might actually be justified this time. 

Then, in October, I will reevaluate.

I won't quit.  I can't quit. 

For those of you who are eager to read some real blog posts, they are coming... And they just might be like some of my older post.  Thought provoking, potentially offensive, but from the heart.  Consider yourself warned.  :)

And since I hate posts without pictures...  

I have started and stopped about 4 different posts that are all trying to say the same thing.  I am stuck.  I don't know what to blog about.  The ups and downs of trying to conceive have all been shared.  My journey is just the same thing over and over and over and... well you know.  No one wants to read about the same things month after month nor do I want to write the same stuff.  I am not sure that it helps me to feel like I am in a hamster wheel.  So, I am sorry for my lack of blogging.  I haven't given up hope.  In fact I am feeling more and more positive every single day. I am getting better, healthier and losing more weight.  No matter what happens I am feeling better about my chances of conceiving, staying pregnant, and turning the page in this much too long novel.

This is not a goodbye.  This is just merely an explanation of where I am.

Also, in addition to being busy working out, we are also preparing to launch a very exciting new project.  Most of you know that ttccommunity.com has been a pet project of mine but very soon, that site is going to come alive. If you are a writer, enjoy writing, or have something to share, we are calling on you to submit articles.  By doing so, you will become eligible to win monthly, quarterly, and a yearly cash prize.  Please  share this contest with anyone that you think might be interested in earning up to $3,200.00 for their writing!


In TTC news, I am 7 days past ovulation and will soon start the testing festivities.  I am hopeful that losing 9 pounds will increase my chances of seeing two pink lines but if not, I'll have the chance to lose another 9 pounds!  I'll update when I know which of these gifts I get!

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